Take Your Best Shot

Not long ago, I made a startling discovery. I don’t need eyeshadow anymore. That’s right. I am at an age where the skin around my eyes pretty much matches the color of my eyeshadow. You probably think I’m exaggerating. Take a look.

Photo on 2013-10-04 at 10.24

Photo on 2013-10-04 at 10.09

Okay, which eye has the eyeshadow? Isn’t easy, is it?

Which doesn’t mean that I’ve stopped wearing eyeshadow. What if someone said, “Oh, I like your eyeshadow,” and I had to say, “Thanks. I’m not wearing any.” How embarrassing would that be? An awkward moment all around.

So I’m dealing with these changing appearance issues, and in the meantime, I know the time has come to update my profile picture – on this blog, on Facebook and anywhere else you need to slap a photo.

I like my old profile picture. I was three years younger then…

JUDY, CIRCA 2010

JUDY, CIRCA 2010

In the interest of full disclosure, however, you have to update these things once in a while; otherwise, you’re like those people on Facebook who put up a picture of their cat, or worse, a picture that’s 12 years old but you like it better than any of your recent, more telling photos because you were thinner then and life hadn’t etched permanent worry lines around your mouth. Man up, I say. These people are your “friends.” They know what you look like.

Confident in the knowledge that I don’t want to be THAT GUY, I got up yesterday morning (I look my best at dawn), put on a full complement of makeup and snapped approximately 54 self-photos in a futile attempt to find one that resembled the me of three years ago. A sampling:

REVIEWING PICTURES #1 TO #53.

REVIEWING PICTURES #1 TO #53.

IS THAT A PIMPLE? I'M TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT.

IS THAT A PIMPLE? I’M TOO OLD FOR THIS SHIT.

DEFINITELY NOT.

DEFINITELY NOT.

HONEST, BUT NO.

HONEST, BUT NO.

SOMETHING IN MY EYE.

SOMETHING IN MY EYE.

 A FACELIFT MAYBE?

A FACELIFT MAYBE?

MILDLY AMUSED. SLIGHTLY BEMUSED. YUP, THAT'S IT.

MILDLY AMUSED. SLIGHTLY BEMUSED. YUP, THAT’S IT.

If you guessed the right eye, you’re right.

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8 Responses to Take Your Best Shot

  1. Jessica says:

    Very funny, Mom. You are so talented.

    Like

  2. Kate says:

    Judy, I love you! I’ll take you anyway you are.

    Like

  3. lexiesnana says:

    You had me at the eye shadow.

    Like

    • Judy says:

      Hi, Lexie’s Nana. Isn’t aging fun? And the grandkids are never so shy that they’re afraid to point out your flaws. My 5-year-old granddaughter likes to jiggle the skin under my upper arms.

      Like

      • lexiesnana says:

        That’s for sure, it wasn’t long ago my seven year old granddaughter Peyton looked at me and said— Nana let’s talk about facial hair. It sent me running to the bathroom. You know how they can pop up over night.

        Like

  4. Gina says:

    Good pictures choice! Certainly better than the options. 🙂

    Like

  5. Cathy says:

    I too, Judea, do not need eye shadow anymore. I call it natural eye shadow. The only reason I still use any is to disguise the droopiness of the upper part. I have become a real artist now! Just thought I would tell you, I know where you’re coming from….

    Do you realize that you resemble Lee Ann/Elaine nowadays? Never noticed the resemblance before.

    Like

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